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Caring for the High Maintenance Child
By Kate Andersen.

Coping with High Maintenance Traits. March, 2018.
Dear Kate:
Derek, is now two and has always been a "crybaby". As an infant, he would not nap unless someone held him......
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 B-DI News
A Newsletter About Caring for the High Maintenance Child

by Kate Andersen, M.Ed.
Issue Theme: Coping with High Maintenance Traits: Shifting to a Positive Focus
Volume 20, Issue 7, March, 2018.

Letter to Kate
by Kate Andersen, M.Ed.

Dear Kate,

Our first child was an absolutely happy baby and is still a happy, well-behaved five-year-old. Our second one, Derek, is now two and has always been a "crybaby". As an infant, he would not nap unless someone held him. As soon as we would put him down in his crib, he would wake up and scream. We always followed the "fifteen minute rule" (let him cry for 15 minutes before we would pick him up). He always outlasted us--he could cry forever. Now, at two, he still cries a lot. If he doesn't get his way, even with the simplest things, he screams. And bedtime is the worst! One night recently, he screamed for over an hour. Our neighbor across the street commented to us a few days later that he almost came over to check on us to make sure everything was all right--Derek was so loud that even he could hear him.

Lately, I've become concerned about two things: the constant crying, and the "manipulation factor". Usually, if he cries long enough, my husband or I will give in. I feel that at two years old, he is learning that he can get his way if he cries and that we're in for even worse behavior in the future.


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